False Hope
by TheJoker'sGotMyHeart
Summary: She knows that he could never love her, so she settles for pretend.


A/N: HEy. This is a short one-shot on what i think it would be like to be helpless in love eith the Joker. So in love that you're willing to believe something, that can't ever be true. But maybe, if you want something bad enough, you can get it :] Anyway review with what you think (:

Disclaimer: Joker ain't mine. Blah.

* * *

She was very curious about his past. She wanted to know why he was like this, who had done it and why. She wanted to cleanse him of his past, to turn him into a new man.

She wanted his love, yes, but not a killer's love. She wanted warm, comforting love that would hold her when she was sad and cure her when she was sick. She wanted him to hold her.

So she had left him in Arkham, hoping it would help him understand what he did to people when he kidnapped and then killed them. It probably wouldn't help. Then again, it might. But she would get him out soon, let him calm down, and then they would talk. They would talk for a long time. Hopefully they wouldn't yell, but knowing him that wasn't very likely. She hoped that he would come out changed.

Everything he does makes her head spin, makes her feel in ways she never thought possible. The way he looks at her, speaks to her, touches her sends electric currents racing though her veins, and she can't help but fall head over heels for him once again.

Even his imperfections, make her knees weak and her heart to race.

There is one thing though, she's deeply worried about. She'd worried one day she'll wake up, only to hear of his impending demise.

She stopped reading the papers weeks ago, quit listening to the news as they spew awful things about he Joker. Openly announcing the fact that his death would be for the greater good, and she wonders how that can be. The Joker's confused is all, not quite sure about life and she's determined to be his light at the end of the tunnel, no matter how bad he hurts her before she gets there.

In the end, she'd change him, show him the light he's too scared to face. Its fear that drove him to be the Joker, and until someone takes the time to listen to him, that fear will continue to drive him off the brink of sanity where he currently resides.

And that's another thing she's constantly awake at night thinking about. His sanity.

She's knows for a fact he's not crazy after all, how could someone with the amount of pure genius such as himself be considered the least bit crazy. He was random, doing what he wanted when he wanted, and that was something the people of Gotham didn't understand. They were more than willing to crucify a man for dimply thinking in a different way, and expressing himself differently than society thought appropriate. And in the time she spent with this man, his illogical mindset became logical.

Underneath his clown war paint, and the signature purple suit he wore he was just a scared little boy, trying to find meaning in a meaningless world. The way he reacted only made sense to those who understood, to everyone else, he was simply a freak.

She hated that, the way everyone made him out to be the bad guy, and had him sent off to Arkham, though she knew being there would do some good, maybe show him the light. But that was a long shot to say the least.

Maybe she was the crazy one, for thinking she could change him, but she never stopped believing. Everyone can be saved, if they let themselves be, and she hopes that he will. She loves him, and deep down, maybe he loves her too.

She doubted it, but she hoped.

* * *

He is between sleep and wakefulness. He didn't like to be here. He had no control over his thoughts or dreams. Everything was up to what his subconscious thought he needed to be shown, and he hated that.

He's in Arkham now, a place he hated to be. It was her job to get him out of here, to save him like he saved her, but he knows she's not going to.

They got into a fight before he got caught, which was a reckless mistake to say the least. He never used to slip up like this, but recently, his world as been torn upside down, and he can't tell whats up or down. Everything's spinning. And he thinks he knows why.

She is like Melanie in so many ways, yet totally different. She was a hopeless romantic, yes, and he knew on some deep level that she had a problem with killing, but she wouldn't admit it. She reminds him of Melanie when they first met, before he had corrupted her, and turned her into someone just like him... a freak.

Though, he can't regret it. A part of him wont allow it. She knew what she was getting herself into, though she may not have know the specifics. Melanie had a choice, and she chose wrong. But that's not the girl he thinks about now. She's not the girl he sleep's beside, watching the rise and fall of her chest, silently thinking about how easily he can end her pathetic life.

But those are just empty thoughts, if it ever came down to it, he knows he could never pull the trigger.

He thinks, probably even knows, that she loves him, and this scares him very much. He doesn't want her to turn out like Melanie is now, six feet below. She would kill him if he said so out loud, but she **is** young, beautiful and naïve, even if she doesn't realize it. She is so full of life and love, ready to give it away, confident that it will be returned.

But he knows that this is only part of her. Only the side of her that he himself is responsible for. He senses that her mood swings are only the tip of the iceberg, and that she has some problems she has to work through, probably having to do with her dead parents. But he did too, and he wasn't about to yell at her for running away from her problems when he was the jack of avoidance.

But maybe she's not his only weakness.

Lately he's been feeling like he's on the edge of some precipise. He is anxious most of the time, though he doesn't know it. He has been fighting with her, and he thinks this isn't how it's supposed to be with her. He wants things to be happy, but he can see the sadness in her eyes, even when she smiles.

It's mostly him, though. He feels panicked and rushed. Twice he has ended up in Arkham because he hasn't been able to think of a plan in time. In the old days, he wouldn't even have to think. He would just do, and it turned out okay. Now nothing is going right, and he thinks he might be going crazy.

The concept seems ridiculous. He is the Joker, after all, and takes pride in being nuts. But this is different. This is a feeling like he is running out of something crucial, something he cannot live without. He doesn't know what he can do about it, and this makes him feel lost.

He knows that when he wakes up for real, he will remember none of this. These thoughts are not available on a conscious level. Talking to her will unlock them, and he knows that he will have some sort of a breakdown. She will probably want to know all sorts of things about his past, and he will tell her. He will let himself be weak in front of her this one time, and then he will take all of this and lock it away. He will become his old self again, and he will feel right again.

He actually doubts this, but he can always hope.

* * *

I hope you lied this, my friend actualyy gave me the idea and helped me write this. They gave me some very inspirational quotes, so if you like, please review. It makes me feel appreciated :]


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